In some ways, this pregnancy has flown by. In other ways, it seems to be dragging on forever.
I’ve had a great pregnancy so far – not much to complain about, aside from all the little discomforts – but I just want it to be done and have my little girl in my arms. People keep telling me to savor every last moment of pregnancy. They tell me I’ll miss being pregnant. Maybe, maybe not. The ultimate goal was never to be pregnant. Getting pregnant and staying pregnant were short-term goals towards the ultimate goal of raising a child. It’s not that I don’t appreciate how fortunate I am to get pregnant and to stay pregnant on our first cycle of IVF…. I do appreciate it, very much. I know many are not that lucky. I wish I was enjoying pregnancy more, finding the “miracle” and “magic” in it all, but that’s just not me. And there’s still that little voice – quiet, but persistent – that something could still go wrong yet….
8 weeks to go feels like forever and right around the corner, all at the same time. (I realize my countdown widget says 1 month. I’m not sure why.) Am I ready? Hell, yes! I’ve been ready for years. There are a million details to finish before she arrives, but in the grand scheme of things, none of it matters as much as her arrival.
Speaking of her arrival…. After reading the above, you may naturally think that I don’t care how she comes into this world as long as she is healthy. Of course that’s true, to an extent. Obviously, I want her to be healthy. But I still have some pretty strong opinions about how I would like the birth experience to unfold. It’s important to me that I’m able to finally trust my body to do what it needs to do. That hasn’t always been the case.
To that end, I posted my birth plan for you to read, if you like. Basically, I’m aiming for a medication-free, intervention-free hospital birth. I hope my birth plan communicates to the medical staff: Everything is on the table, but these are our priorities. We are reasonable people who know things will not go exactly as planned, but we appreciate your help in maintaining our priorities to the extent that it’s medically safe for both myself and our baby. That sounds reasonable, right?
**Baby update** As suspected, C has flipped from breech to head down! I felt her move about a week and a half ago, and today the OB confirmed. I have a final ultrasound on Monday to check her lower spine (could not see it before due to her position). Keeping my fingers crossed she holds position until her birth day!