Twice now I have attempted to purchase something baby-related, as a show of confidence that this pregnancy will indeed end with a healthy baby in my arms. The first time, I got distracted and bought a bunch of clothes for my cousin’s preemie, who recently reached “newborn” size after being born 12 weeks early. The second time, I just didn’t find anything that spoke to me.
To prove that I do have confidence (or that I’m really good at pretending), I submit the following evidence:
Sometime between weeks 6 and 7, I ordered some fairly expensive yarn with the intention of knitting a blanket for our baby. On Sunday, I started that project. It’s the first time I’ve ever knitted something with a cable pattern, which I thought would be a challenge, but it turns out it’s pretty easy (though slow-going).
So, now I don’t feel so bad that I haven’t purchased a onesie or a pair of tiny shoes. To me, this blanket means so much more, because of all the time and effort that will go into knitting every stitch. It’s my hope that knitting this blanket (a little bit, every day) will help this pregnancy feel more real and help me feel more connected to the baby growing inside of me.
Finally, I leave you with our gummy bear, 9 weeks today, heart rate 185. This was my last scan with the RE. I am now officially an OB patient! I told my boss and coworkers today, as well. (They all knew we were doing IVF, but, respecting my privacy, have not asked about the results. I figured it was time to share the good news.) I kind of want to start telling everyone now. But I won’t. Well, maybe just a few.