I first heard the phrase “consolation prize” while watching The Price is Right when I was a kid. Because of the context, I knew immediately what it meant – Sorry you didn’t win, but maybe a one-year supply of Rice-a-Roni will make you feel better. It wasn’t until recently that I really started thinking about the phrase and its root “console.”
If we can’t have a baby, then….
I do it all the time now, give myself little consolation prizes when a cycle fails, or dream of larger consolation prizes if the whole baby thing turns out to be a bust.
If I can’t be pregnant, then I’m drinking as much wine as I possibly can.
If I can’t be pregnant, then I’m getting as many massages and pedicures as I want.
If we can’t have a baby, then I’m spoiling the hell out of my nieces and nephews, despite parental protest.
If we can’t have a baby, then I want to have adventures in distant lands.
These things aren’t meant to be replacements for a baby – I hope that’s obvious – but they do make me feel better, at least temporarily. They console me. They lessen the disappointment of not being pregnant. They give comfort that we can still have a rich, fulfilling life, even if we never have a baby.
If we can’t have a baby, then we’re adopting kittens.
Meet Zazzles and Toonces, the newest additions to our family.
I know what you’re thinking, but they are not our “furbabies” (do any cat people think that way?). Yes, my main motivation was to have a living thing to take care of and dote over, but I throw up in my mouth a little when I think of referring to us as “mommy” and “daddy” to these furry balls of complete adorableness. It’s fine for others, but that’s not who we are.
Still, it’s nice to have warm, cuddly, needy (for now) creatures in our home. They are endlessly entertaining!
And adorable when they sleep.
What are your infertility consolation prizes?